Borderline Personality Disorder: Borderline personality disorder is characterized by a pervasive pattern of difficulty in interpersonal relationships, alternating between idealization and demonization of people, difficulty with mood regulation, anger, irritability, impulsiveness, unstable self image, and often including suicidal behavior (ideation, threats, attempts), and self-damaging behaviors.
I’ve been told I am crazy more times than I’ve been told I’m smart or strong or worthy of love. I’ve been diagnosed and re-diagnosed. I’ve spent a lot of my life trying to figure out what’s “wrong” with me and how to “fix” myself.
I went from unhappy to miserable to struggling to overwhelmed to depressed and suicidal. First I was diagnosed with post-natal depression, followed by treatment-resistant clinical depression. Then came the biggest clanger of all, diagnosis number three: borderline personality disorder.
Yes, I have been diagnosed with depression, OCD and borderline personality disorder. Yet, I am still a good person.
I finally I agreed to ECT (electroconvulsive therapy). I was both intrigued and terrified. After my ECT treatments I started to feel like a human again.
Radical acceptance helps me with PTSD and bipolar disorder with borderline traits. Radical acceptance dictates that change is just another part of life.
I look “normal” though I’m a mom with PTSD and bipolar disorder with borderline traits. This is part 1 of 3 of my recovery story from an abusive childhood.
“If someone ever asks me, I will be the first one to tell them that I have a mental illness and that I am in recovery from it.” —Jennifer Agnew